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Saturday 13 September 2014

Loneliness and the fourth book

After finishing Can Tea Really Make You Invisible? I felt somewhat drained, not bursting with the energy that I expected, or the energy that I really needed.  I planned to immediately knuckle down and focus on the third book in my series of five promised books, but didn't get the vibe.  There was a craving, oh, a strong craving, but it wasn't right.

With this feeling of disjointedness I set about a bout of rage.  I went to a shop, not far from my home, and immediately slapped a member of staff, right across their inadequate face.  The shop?  Tesco.  The face?  A child.  The parents?  Elsewhere.
"Some freaky looking woman is slapping a child over here!" shouted a bad fellow, on the other side of fifty.
I ran from the shop and returned to my home.

Sitting in the living room of my home, I became overwhelmed with loneliness.  I missed the feeling of someone actually liking me, perhaps even loving me.  This had been niggling away at the back of my head from the moment the police arrested me for the murder of my husband. 'Simply' Gary.  A murder that I didn't do.  A murder committed by a big brown bear.

My next book couldn't be the third book as it wouldn't contain the elements needed for my survival, and the prevention of my impending end in 2020.

To break the cycle and provide me with what I need, I began work on restoring the book of ghost stories that was read to me by my nan when I was a child.  Hidden among the words of that book are a dark magic.  A dark magic that will help restore the love I once had.

I sit here now, the rain is falling.  I am looking at my mask on my table, it's grinning at me.  It is mocking my feelings.  Outside, in a bin are the remains of 'Simply' Gary.

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